Dean L. Forbes

How to Overcome Procrastination

This debilitating disease has plagued us all at one point or another in our lives. For some of us, it is a constant and infectious virus running amuck in our world. My experience is that procrastination is a dream killer – it can really take you out of the game of life. If you are unaware of the dangers, it can take you out for good. 

The bottom line is that a procrastinator is a self-assassinator. 

For those brave enough to accept the challenge of curing this awful disease, the results are staggeringly positive when you succeed. The sad truth is that the challengers are few and far between. 

I have met and counseled so many individuals who set goal after goal but never get around to taking one step towards them. And by the way, I’m not talking about dodo heads and morons – I’m talking about people with at least half a brain which is more than enough to get most things done. 

  

Why people procrastinate

Fear is the number one reason why people procrastinate. It’s either fear of failure or even success. It’s the fear of looking stupid to the world if it doesn’t work. It is a mark of the cynicism and negativity that has taken root in our psyche over time. Unless you can weed this out, procrastination is sure to be the victor.

 

Think about it for a moment… 

What are you waiting for to go after your dreams? The truth is that the tides will never be just right; the moon and the stars will not align perfectly to give you a sign. This is a fool’s folly – your destiny is not out there – it rests with you. No matter what excuses you make and no matter how many justifications you give, your future is still in your hands. The moon and stars align only when you are ready to act – it may seem like a miracle but it won’t happen unless you make it happen.

 

Here’s what usually happens though… 

First you tell yourself it’s not the right time and yet you make no plans or preparations for when the right time arrives. How can it ever be the right time if you are not prepared? 

Next you ask yourself “what if it doesn’t work?” This is only gives you a myriad of reasons why not. The one you should be asking, the one that truly makes a difference, is “what if it does work?” 

The list could go on and on here but I think you get the gist. People with an excuse mindset will come up with all sorts of rational lies (rationalize) why something cannot happen and won’t work.

 

The right mindset

In order to diminish procrastinating habits, it is important that you have the right mindset. If your first response is to make excuses and offer justifications when you are challenged, procrastination grows in your life. These are the elements that this debilitating disease feeds on; this is how it envelops your life. 

The more excuses you make, the more procrastination grows. Have you ever noticed that when you put off one thing just how easy it becomes to put off the next thing? It can become a vicious cycle before you realize what is really happening. By the time you wake up and smell the coffee, you’re in debt, you’ve been passed over for that promotion 3 times, you’re about to lose your house and your wife and kids don’t know you anymore. 

OK… a little dramatic – yes. I am sure you can appreciate the underlying message though; if you aren’t careful procrastination can cause major upheaval in your life. 

The mindset that works to eliminate procrastination is one of responsibility and accountability. You must endeavor to hold yourself accountable for your actions or in this case your inaction. You have to be the first person not to let you off the hook with feeble excuses and justifications. 

If you need to, devise a system of actions and consequences for yourself. For instance, every time you make excuses for your actions, you deprive yourself of something you really love – your favorite food, your favorite pastime, sex. 

It might sound silly; however, if you can muster the strength to practice this, your procrastinating ways will surface quickly and often. The goal of this exercise is to raise your awareness of how often you procrastinate – even about the simplest things. Often times, we don’t even realize this is happening until the disease has become a giant malignant tumor.

 

Reducing Procrastinating Behaviors

I am not going to write about eliminating procrastination completely because I don’t know if that is realistic. I mean, there are things that I still procrastinate on; they just aren’t the most important in my life. 

My experience is that reducing procrastination especially around the things that matter most, significantly improves your success rate at anything. So, even though I am sure that some of you don’t procrastinate at all about anything, I won’t take that route because I’d be a hypocrite. 

Following are 5 habits that help to reduce procrastination significantly.

1. Create a personal mission statement – this will help you center and focus your energies. A personal mission statement outlines what you are about, where you are going and how you plan to get there. You see, often times we procrastinate because we don’t have a clear picture in our minds who we are or where we are going; this creates “scatter brain” syndrome.

2. Write down and date your goals – this is so important; it’s a lesson I had to learn the hard way over and over before it clicked in my brain. This is probably one of the most powerful habits that I have ever developed. When you write down and date your goals, they instantly become real. Now it’s in ink and you can look at it. You have something to refer back to; you don’t need to remember what you’re supposed to be doing. When you write down and date your goals, you can track them; you can track yourself against them to see how you are doing. Many times we don’t even know how badly we suck because we have no barometer – no checks and balances. When your goals are written down and dated, it is harder to hide from them. 

3. Make “to do” lists – whether you do this daily or weekly, it is important to make “to do” lists. This is another powerful tool because each time you check something off, you get more excited. When you don’t have a list, you don’t even know what you’ve done and worse, days may go by and you haven’t done one thing that you really wanted to do. Your to do list is a guide – it is your tactic sheet that is helping you execute the strategy you’ve put together to achieve your goals.

4. Celebrate all wins – it is important that you celebrate all your wins no matter how small. Each time you check something off your list, you should celebrate it because you’ve accomplished something. When you do this, it will fuel your passion and motivation to do even more and achieve at even greater heights. Celebrating a win can be as easy as pumping a fist in the air, pulling it in and saying “YES” emphatically. Blair Singer taught me that one and it really gets your juices going.

5. Debrief regularly – whether you succeed or not at something, it is extremely important that you debrief yourself. Do this alone or with someone else if you need to BUT do it. Procrastination is like a virus – it latches on to negativity quickly and just spreads like wildfire. Especially when things don’t go as planned, it is important that you get your head around it as quickly as possible by debriefing. Ask yourself what worked and what didn’t and then learn from the hiccups. Don’t internalize the failure and let that stop you from moving forward or trying again… failure is just an event not you. 

Practicing these 5 habits will undoubtedly improve your ability to focus and center your energies. You will be able to overcome procrastination more easily and quickly especially in the areas that matter most to you. 

Procrastination may be a debilitating and vigorous disease but the good news is that there is a cure. What are you waiting for… stop procrastinating and get off your ass.  

 

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How to Remove Personal Growth Limitations

There are no limitations except for the ones we place on ourselves. Limits are man-made control mechanisms that have been hardwired into our systems for far too long and with damaging effects. The good news is that history is filled with great examples of those that have stood firm in the belief and principle that there are no limits but those that we make up. 

At one time, no one ever thought man could fly until the Wright brothers built the first flying machine. There was a time when no one thought man could climb Mount Everest until Sir Edmund Hillary proved the world wrong. There are all sorts of limits that have been placed, or rather, misplaced on us; and yet great individuals like Barak Obama continue to shatter those limitations day after day. 

Why do we place limits on ourselves? Why do we hinder our personal growth and development by putting up invisible and seemingly immovable walls? Why do we live in a free society and yet live the lives of confined creatures? 

The purpose of this article is to help you remove these barriers; to rid yourself of doubt and to quell all the excuses of why you are unable to grow beyond a certain point. The goal is to raise your level of awareness about your ultimate power so that you can quickly abandon the whining, bitching and complaining and start living the incredible life your were meant to live. 
  

Recognize and Understand Personal Growth Limiters

Personal growth limiters, like all limiters, are the stories we make up in our minds as to why we can’t do or achieve something. The problem arises when you are not aware that they are present in your life. Most of us walk around in complete ignorance, or what one of my mentors calls “unconscious incompetence” with regard to our self-limiting behaviors and attitudes. 

When you are unconsciously incompetent, you are unable to even recognize what you are doing let alone why. The key is to be aware of how these personal growth limiters show up in your life. Following are a few examples of the forms in which they may appear.

1. Justification – we can do this without even thinking; it’s the classic defense mode we go into when our position, performance or values are challenged. The posture is reactive and we begin to rationalize (tell rational lies) our words, actions and perspectives. Justification limits your growth because it closes you off from learning anything new. 

2. Excuses – this is also a popular mode of self-limiting behavior. Instead of owning and learning from our mistakes, we make excuses for them. If you cannot admit your mistakes, you will never be able to truly learn from them. If you can’t learn from your mistakes, you cannot change and grow. Your personal growth will stifle. 

3. Cynicism – this is how we fill ourselves with and spread doubt to those around us. Cynicism causes you to believe everything is just too good to be true; that if someone achieves some level of success, it must be shear luck. All of this is just to make you feel better about living under a rock or in a cave like a hibernating bear. 

4. Baggage – all of us have skeletons in our closets; I have tons. The key is to remember that your past is just that, the past. It does not determine your future. What often happens is that individuals refuse to put down or let go of past baggage. In some cases, people actually feel guilty if they let go of it believing that somehow it’s supposed to remain a part of them due to some twisted sense of sentiment. Nothing that limits your growth deserves a place in your life – NOTHING! 

There are certainly other personal growth limiters that I can list here or that you can come up with yourself. The point is that the ultimate limiter is YOU. No matter what you think the limitation is, you control how it acts in your life. You place it and you can remove it.

 

Own your mistakes

Don’t make excuses for your mistakes – own them. If you can admit when you’ve made an error, you will be able to learn from it and adapt much more quickly. When you continuously dodge the responsibility, you remain in ignorance – in unconscious incompetence. 

If you don’t even know what you don’t know, how can you learn and grow from where you are? It will be impossible for you to achieve any level of success in your personal growth if you simply hide from your mistakes and make excuses. 

Instead of making excuses, ask questions like, what went wrong? What can I do differently or better next time? Do I need more resources or information? All of these questions will help you grow because if you are seeking answers, you are seeking growth. 

Consider this… 

There are no truly successful individuals without the foundation of failures on which their success is built. A major difference between winners and losers is that winners own and learn from their mistakes.

 

Let go of the past

Your past, no matter how horrible, does not determine your future. It doesn’t matter what you’ve been taught or conditioned to believe, you can choose to rewrite the script for your future. 

Let me put it this way… 

Sometimes when I conduct workshops or deliver presentations, I ask the audience the following 4 questions as taught to me by the incomparable Zig Ziglar. 

1. Is there something specific that you can do in the next 2 weeks that can make your personal and professional life worse? 

2. Is there something specific that you can do in the next 2 weeks that can make your personal and professional life better? 

3. Do you believe that the choice is yours?

4. Do you believe that every choice has an end result? 

Usually when I ask these questions, 99.99% of the people in the room will answer yes to all four. Read the questions again; if you can answer yes to all four, here’s what you’ve basically said whether you realize it or not. 

I don’t really care what has happened in my past; I don’t even care what my circumstances are right now. I know that there is something specific that I can do in the next 2 weeks that can make my personal and professional life better or worse and the choice is mine. 

What an incredible realization? When you break it down this way, it is crystal clear that your past does not determine your future. The choices you make today are what will determine your tomorrow. 

Your past becomes a personal growth limiter when you refuse to let it go. You have to purge past events that impede your growth in order to move forward. Now, I am not naïve; I know that it can be hard to shed the past sometimes – even excruciating. Here’s the deal though… 

Whether you do it alone, seek help from a mentor or join a group, if you don’t purge past events that hamper your thoughts, behaviors and attitudes, your personal growth will suffer. Don’t let the fact that it might be hard to do stop you – in that too you certainly have the power to choose. 

Your past does not determine your future; however, it can certainly limit your personal growth. 

 

Value the present

Placing high value on the present is vital to your personal growth and development. This is because your future will be determined by the choices you make in the present. While tomorrow is not determined by what happened yesterday, it is most certainly determined by what happens today. 

Here’s why you should place high value on the present – on what you do today. 

Stephen Colbret, comedian and talk show host, once led a roast of then President George W. Bush. During that roast he sarcastically chided the president about the reasons for going to war with Iraq. Basically, he recounted that the main reasons were suspicion of harboring terrorists as well as hoarding weapons of mass destruction. 

After numerous inspections, no evidence of either was found in Iraq; and yet we went to war anyway. Now here’s the punch line… 

Stephen Colbret went on to say that he appreciated the president’s determination and bullheadedness because he’s a man that believes the same thing on Wednesday that he did on Monday, no matter what happened on Tuesday.  

This is no knock against former President George W. Bush; however, the analogy holds true. You can change your stars whenever you choose. You don’t have to believe that what happened in the past is going to direct your choices for your future. 

In order to achieve success in your personal growth, you must be willing to believe something else; to believe in change. From this point forward, you must be willing to make different choices; ones that you truly believe will best help you achieve what you truly desire. 

Your present choices are all that matter where your future is concerned; they will determine where you are and what you have tomorrow – guaranteed.

 

Have hope for the future

There is simply no point in investing in your personal growth if you have no real hope for the future. Why bother? 

Zig Ziglar puts it this way… 

“The salesperson that has no hope of making the sale doesn’t make the call. Why bother, he doesn’t believe he’s going to make the sale anyway.”

 

Having hope for the future is crucial to your personal growth. It is the fuel for your drive to succeed because you wake up everyday with a deep and abiding belief that you are heading for something greater than yourself. It’s about knowing that you have something of value to offer others; the world. 

There are no truly successful individuals whom do not have tons and tons of hope for the future. In fact, the future is what successful people think about when they plan; they don’t just think about the present, they think about future generations. This is how you make a difference – you must have hope for the future; a belief in a better world than the one you were born into. 

If you don’t believe that you’re going to do anything great; be anything of value to others or that the world can be better off for you having been in it, why would you care about your personal growth? You would have no reason to – you’re apathetic. 

You might as well be like the type of people John Mayer once sang about... you know the people who keep waiting on the world to change before they do all the while whining, bitching and complaining. 

You know, there’s a word for people who behave this way – Hypocrite! If you whine, bitch and complain about everything from your boss who doesn’t like you, to the co-worker trying to destroy you, to the negative news on television and the sex, drugs and violence on your DVD player – and yet you still do absolutely nothing to change it… Now that is a Hypocrite.  

The best way you can strengthen your hope for the future is to model the wise words of Mahatma Gandhi, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”

 

Believe in infinite possibilities

If you have true hope for the future, then you can certainly believe in infinite possibilities. Sometimes the thing that hampers our personal growth the most is our lack of belief in the possibilities. We are so hardwired to use words like “Can’t” or say things like “I don’t have much of a choice.” 

This type of thinking limits our personal growth tremendously. The fact is that whether you believe you can or you can’t, you are absolutely right. Belief is what produces results; actions are just the steps driven by the belief. To the degree that you believe in something, your actions will match in intensity and focus and the results you achieve will reflect the same. 

Possibilities are in fact endless. If you can tap into your true gifts and talents, you can unleash unimaginable creativity and tenacity that can usher in changes the world has yet to dream up. If this sounds too far fetched for you, consider this… 

We’ve put men on the moon, we’ve cloned animals; we created the Internet, we have Facebook addicts; my Dad is on Facebook; Twitter lets us tweet our life story to millions; we survived 9/11; Barak Obama is the first black president of the United States; Joan Rivers is 102 and looks 70; we watch movies is Imax theatres in 3D; Gene Rodenberry created Star Trek in the 1960s and we now have the ability to beam people up (OK, not really – not yet but it’s possible) 

Do you get the idea though? Nothing is impossible. I am being a bit facetious with my examples; however, the point is that at some point in history, most of the things I mentioned weren’t even a remote possibility in most people’s minds. Oh, I forgot to mention that Rod Sterling created the Twilight Zone in the 1950s and these episodes and characters still have major relevance today – absolutely genius. 

So, remove the limit from your personal growth; start believing in possibilities and know that they are endless. This is how you change you; this is how you change the world. Work on yourself, improve your personal growth and the rest will fall into place. 

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How to Overcome Analysis Paralysis

Why is it that some people almost always seem to be moving forward while others seem constantly stuck in a rut? Have you ever felt like you were stuck in a rut? 

This happens to the best of us from time to time and that’s totally expected; the real conundrum is how to get out of the rut. 

Firstly, getting stuck in a rut can be caused by many different factors. From writer’s block to stumbling block, there are a myriad of conditions and situations that might bring them on. The objective of this article is to address one of the major factors of “getting stuck in a rut” and how to defeat it. 

Many individuals usually find themselves feeling trapped because of fear and the incapacity to take action. This person is usually plagued by indecisiveness and thought clutter which builds frustration and causes high anxiety. This individual is also most likely over-analyzing every situation in his/her life. 

This disease that afflicts so many is called Analysis Paralysis. 

Analysis Paralysis is a fear-driven disease that feeds on insecurity and ignorance. It is such a powerful immobilizer that it can literally keep people in a box curled up like a fetus incapable of making a move. 

The following are my best insights that can undoubtedly help you beat this terrible disease – AND – if you know someone else, who suffers from this disease, please do them the great service of sharing this post. 

Adopting the following 4 elements will help you overcome Analysis Paralysis.

 

1.  Accept the possibility of failure

Failure is nothing to fear; in fact, you should embrace it. Without failure, success could not exist. It is through our failures that we learn the most about how to succeed. There is always the possibility that you may not achieve the goal you set forth; however, it is nothing to fear. 

Instead, try letting go and enjoying the journey. Your success is largely dependent upon how you view your failures. If you beat yourself up each time you fall short of your goal; if you internalize your failures, it will be difficult for you to succeed. 

It is imperative that you understand that failure is an event, never a person. When you can do that, it will become much easier to accept the possibility that you may fall short of your goal and it’s totally ok. 

The truth is that it is far worst to do nothing than it is to try and fail. At the very least, you will learn something new when you’ve tried and failed. You will undoubtedly learn what not to do the next time around. Most great discoveries saw numerous failures before the brilliant stroke of success ever saw the light of day. 

Ask yourself, “What’s worse than failure?” How will you succeed at anything if you try nothing? That is most certainly worse than failure. If you can accept that all things are possible, then you can certainly accept that failure is one of those possibilities.

 

2. Learn from your failures

This is the key to turning all failures into new discoveries; you have to look for the lessons within them. There is so much you can learn by looking at your mistakes and your missteps. 

This is the reason why failures are events and not people – not you. You have the power to choose to learn from them instead of internalizing them which leads to dejection and frustration. The key is to understand the things that went wrong and why they did and then make adjustments the next time around. It is only when you give up that the failing event wins in your life. 

Remember that when things don’t work the way you expect them to, that is the universes way of helping you to grow. A new opportunity is born each time a failure occurs; it’s another chance to do something great. What most people do when they fail is give up; they blame everyone and everything under the son and this they completely miss the lesson. 

What happens after that is the fear-driven way of thinking – analyzing every move to death until no moves are made at all. You cannot grow and change by doing the same things and remaining the same way – it is impossible.

 

3. Stand on your core values

Analysis Paralysis feeds on insecurity, ignorance and indecisiveness. If you have strong core values – a set of principles that you strive to live by, stand on them. Whenever you feel overwhelmed or like you don’t know which way to go, allow your core values to point you in the right direction.

Chances are good that if you simply surrender to your core values, your decisions will yield far greater results. As long as your values are grounded in correct principles, you will reap excellent benefits. 

When you stand on what you truly believe in, you can do so with full acceptance of the consequences of doing so. The point is that you cannot allow confusion to win when it sets in; you can clear it up if you are crystal clear on your values.

 

4.Just do it

Be like Nike and just do it. Surely you can lay the best plans; do the most thorough research but at some point you have to dive in and test drive it. Just do it. What’s the worse that can happen – it doesn’t work – BUT – what if it does. Individuals who have a positive attitude are always thinking about “what if it works?” 

Analysis Paralysis will always keep you thinking of the glass as half empty instead of half full. Don’t worry about making mistakes – that’s what they are for – you can always get a do-over. 

Most successful people will tell you that they learned the most about their journey along the way. It is because of the trial and error why some people achieve greatness – they were not afraid to fail. They are always thinking, “what if I succeed?” 

So, just do it! 

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How to Develop and Cultivate Authentic Leadership

If you are not a leader and do not have any interest in becoming one – STOP NOW – don’t bother reading one more word of this article. It would be absolutely pointless since you won’t benefit and neither will anyone else because you’re content with being ordinary. 

Are you still there? 

Awesome – that makes you extraordinary – for sticking around that is. 

Authentic leadership is a quality that is far too scarce; not enough of us are willing to participate in something greater than ourselves. This is probably because the road isn’t always easy and the price is steep. The commitment necessary to facilitate the emergence of authentic leadership is not something most are willing to accept. 

For the few who are and do, the goal of this article is to provide insights that can undoubtedly help you develop and cultivate authentic leadership. I will share with you what I have learned from some of the finest minds of the last half century; from my experience and many incredible mentors.

 

What is Authentic Leadership?

Authentic Leadership requires that you be the epitome of the changes you want to see in the world. It is leading others by example, doing the right things while exercising the humility to stand with people and not above them. 

It is not about being perfect; it is about the continuous pursuit of excellence not only in self but also in others. My good friend and mentor, Ann Mincey, once gave me a gift of what she sees in me. She presented me with a simple card that read “Others.” This card, once given to her by her pastor, represented the true purpose of leadership in one word. Others simply means that you seek to find the best in and grow others. That’s authentic. 

Authentic leaders are not afraid to roll up their sleeves and get their hands dirty; in fact, you will not find one that would ever ask of anyone what he/she is not willing to do himself/herself. 

Again, it is not about being perfect but rather a constant drive to embody these qualities with the sole purpose of making a positive difference in the lives of others.

 

Who is an Authentic Leader?

No, the answer is not simply anyone; however, it is anyone with the courage to live his/her values no matter what. This person can come from anywhere; from any walk of life; any color, creed or stature – it doesn’t matter. As long as you are open and willing to learn what it takes to tap into your incredible human potential; to unleash your powerful creativity and tenacity in sharing your true gifts – you are an authentic leader. 

If you dare to be different in taking right action even in the face of extreme adversity; if you possess the valor to stand alone on your principles – you are an authentic leader. Contrary to popular belief, leaders are neither born nor made, rather they emerge. They can pop up anywhere and at anytime; it depends on what the situation is and who is involved. If there is a person within the ranks that possess the qualities outlined above – a leader will emerge. 

Now, I won’t mince words with you or offer you fluff. The fact that you’re reading this means that you’re way too smart for that. I believe, based on the information available at the time of this publication that 99% of people will not emerge as authentic leaders. Forgive me if that sounds a bit pessimistic; I assure you I am not. The plain fact is that most people simply will not commit to this challenge either because of fear paralysis or complacency. Either way – they will remain sheep. What about you? 
  

The 2 Paradigms of Authentic Leadership

There are 2 paradigms of authentic leadership; independent and interdependent. It is in the mastery of these 2 paradigms lies complete authentic leadership. 

Your understanding of both of these is crucial if you want to develop and cultivate authentic leadership. 

Independent Leadership – Succeed with self

Independent leadership requires a commitment to personal growth, change and evolution. Stephen R. Covey, one of my favorite authors calls this “Private Victory.” 

Private victories are mainly focused on your personal growth and development. It is in this mode of leadership that you define who you are, what your values are and how you respond to the world around you. This is the development and cultivation of personal authentic leadership. 

There are 3 main elements that help you achieve excellence in your independent leadership. This is how you succeed with self.

1. Be proactive – you must accept 100% responsibility for your actions and responses to the people and circumstances around you. It doesn’t matter where you are from and how you were raised; you have the power to choose your path. This includes what you do and how you do it. Being proactive means that you march to the beat of your own drum. You do not react only when someone or something acts on you – that’s reactive. Rather, you take action to make things happen; you move and influence the people and circumstances around you – that’s proactive. 

2. Begin with the results you desire – plan your goals from the finish line backwards. When you understand and are clear on your mission, it is easier to mount the correct strategy to achieve your goal. Your success depends on how well you can express your objective.  Your intent and desire is your compass for developing the correct map to reach your destination successfully.

3. Prioritize appropriately – authentic leadership demands that you put first things first instead of last. It also demands that you don’t waste your energy on meaningless and trivial matters that add no value to anyone. You must learn to execute around priorities; make sure you place high value on the things that matter most to you. Do not take anything for granted because that which we take for granted we lose. Remember the important things and sometimes these are the little things and then endeavor to address them in order of importance. Give them the time and energy that they require; that they deserve. 

Interdependent Leadership – Succeed with others

Interdependent leadership requires a commitment to successfully connecting and collaborating with others. Stephen R. Covey calls this “Public Victory.” 

Public victories are mainly focused on working with and growing others. It is in this mode of leadership that you define how you will add value to others and also how you will cherish and nurture the gifts of others in valuing them. This is the development of authentic public leadership. 

There are 3 main elements that help you achieve excellence in your interdependent leadership. This is how you succeed with others.

1. Seek the third alternative – the third alternative says that you only accept win/win outcomes otherwise you walk away. The main point of the third alternative is to seek the best course of action in all your endeavors. The best course of action is one where all parties affected are happy with the results. If this is not feasible at any given time, then the best course of action is to walk away with clean hearts. This type of attitude sparks excellence in creativity and cooperation.

2. Listen first before you speak – authentic leaders are master listeners; they recognize that it is a gift and they give it often. It is better to first understand others before seeking to have them understand you. In order to succeed at understanding, you must genuinely want to do it. No matter how many books you read and from whom you take advice, you will not hear a thing others say unless you truly want to. True understanding requires that you listen actively with the intent to hear what the other person has to say.

3. Value Collaboration – 2 heads are truly better than one. J. Paul Getty said “I’d rather have 1% each of 100 men than 100% of one man.” This is because he understood the power of cooperation. He understood that it is through synergy that the pinnacle of excellence is achieved. Authentic leaders encourage and reward creativity; they praise those who speak up and they teach others to find their voice. You must place high value on collaboration in order to succeed in interdependent leadership.  

These 2 paradigms of authentic leadership make up the authentic leader; I know of none who do not understand these and strive to succeed at them daily. They consistently seek to learn and grow so that they can succeed in private as well as in public.

 

What’s Next?

First of all, you should know that nothing in this article is original except for my style of writing. It is all based on universal and unchanging principles – natural law. These have always worked and will continue to work indefinitely. 

If you truly want to be an authentic leader, reading this article is a great start. If you wish to continue your journey, here are several more things I suggest you do immediately.

1. Add this blog to your favorites
2. Share it with others
3. Subscribe to the P³G Newsletter
4. Subscribe to my RSS feed
5. Read the book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People
6. Get off your ass and take action 
    

Don’t get discouraged and never give up because we need you to lead us.

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Moving Up In a Down Economy

The state of the economy is always at the forefront of the media as well as top of mind for people. It goes without saying that there is a legitimate concern with the financial status of our government at all times. 

There is a constant sense of anticipation in the air as it pertains to careers, businesses and the world economy at large.  Everyone has a stake in the health of the economy; some folks are worried about losing their jobs while others worry about failing in business. In either case, the state of the economy weighs on your mind. 

The good news in all of this is that no matter what the media portrays and regardless of how the economy is doing; some folks still tend to do very well. It seems no matter how bad things seem to be, there are professionals and business owners who almost always seem to be moving up even in a down economy. 

Do you want to be one of these individuals? 

The goal of this article is to provide you with some tips on how you can ensure that you continue an upward momentum even in a down economy.

 

For Professionals

If you have a career and you want to ensure that it keeps growing and getting better, there are definitely some things you can do to achieve the results you desire. 

There are 2 key things you must remember at all times and then endeavor to make sure that every move you make is aligned with at least one or both. You should be certain that whatever you do in your career that you are either making or saving your company money. 

This is the main reason most companies exist – to make a profit. If you can understand that, then it should be pretty easy to grasp the concept of making or saving your company money. You don’t have to perform duties that are in direct correlation with either of these activities; however, at the end of the day, your role must tie back to at least one or both. 

There are a few adjustments you can make to improve your status among your colleagues and management teams. These tips will help ensure that they see your relevance as it pertains to one or both of the keys.

1. Embody the company mission – make sure that you understand this inside-out and then align your actions with it every chance you get. If you don’t believe in the company mission, this will be extremely difficult for you.  Start each presentation and project plan with the goal of fulfilling the company mission.

2. Start solving problems – choose a problem that your company has and then solve it. First make sure that you can quantify the resolution in dollars and cents; either by how much the company will make or how much it will save as a result. If the resolution to the problem does not directly or indirectly tie to making or saving the company money, choose one that does. 

3. Increase productivity – find ways to get more done in less time; this alone can solidify your stature in the eyes of the brass. I don’t mean that you should kill yourself trying to do this; I mean work smart and locate alternative resources that will help you achieve the results you desire.

4. Request a meeting with your boss – this is where you let your boss know that you are thinking about the future of the organization; in this meeting you want to ask for his/her input on the main things you ought to focus on in order to help the company achieve its objectives. This move shows initiative; it is just the type of proactive stance that companies look for and keep. 

If you really think about this, there are many more tips you may be able to add as well depending on where you work and what you do. Just make sure that what ever you do is either making or saving your company money. If you are not doing one of these things either directly or indirectly, watch your six. 

Other things you can do to ensure that you continue to move up in a down economy involve your personal growth activities. Always seek out venues, events and people that can help you improve your skills and value. Make sure that you keep your resume current because sometimes moving up means moving out. You don’t want to get caught with your pants down.  

If you don’t have a mentor, now is a good time to get one. In fact, get 2 or more and make sure that one of them is an influential person within your organization. This is what influential people live to do – influence! Trust me, you have only to ask a few people to be your mentor and if your reputation is in good standing, I doubt you have any trouble. 

An influential mentor can come in handy when it’s time to hand out pink slips – guess who won’t be getting one if your mentor likes you. No one gets rid of their protégé unless it is absolutely necessary. 

Moving up in a down economy demands that you stay fresh and relevant to the decision-makers. You have to remain visible; in order to do that, you must be part of high visibility things. Being a part of the solution, increasing output and reducing time and being proactive are all highly visible elements.

 

For Entrepreneurs

If you are a business owner, your main concern is losing profits. You obviously need a certain amount of revenue to sustain your business and a down economy does not necessarily make that easy. 

Here’s the silver lining for you; if you can begin viewing the state of the economy as an opportunity as opposed to a problem, you’re half way there. Furthermore, that attitude will put you light years ahead of the competition. You see, the most common thing that entrepreneurs do when the economy is down is join the Nay-Sayers in their negative thinking. 

The most positive and productive thing you can do for your business is to think differently. Observe the masses and do the opposite. While your competition sees problems, you see solutions to improving customer service. 

What successful entrepreneurs know is that no matter what state the economy is in, their main focus is always to create and distribute value to their customers. They understand that once they continue to look for new and better ways to fulfill their customers’ needs, their value to those customers will increase immediately. 

One of the chief goals of consumers, especially in a down economy, is to feel secure and valued with the people with whom they do business. There is no question that if your product or service is relevant and you find ways of creating and distributing value to your customers, your business will continue to grow. You will move up in a down economy. 

Those who do not focus on this crucial aspect of their businesses will undoubtedly kill their profits. If you want to continue moving up in any economy, focus and creating and distributing value to your customers. With consumers holding on tighter to their wallets, what will make them open them up to you? You must offer something of value to them – that is the only way.

 

Keen Awareness

For anyone who wishes to continue moving up in a down economy, it is important that you raise your awareness of the definition of value as it pertains to what you do. It is your responsibility to decipher the best ways of adding value in your capacity. Simply knowing the ropes and technical aspects of your role is no longer enough to sustain you. 

Whether you are in a good or bad economy, your primary goal should always be seeking newer and better ways of adding value. Regardless of your job description, what type of career you have or type of business you own, focusing on adding value will undoubtedly yield greater rewards. 

When your level of awareness is at a high level, you will be able to hone in on specific areas wherein you can add the most value. Knowing what the people around you need most is crucial in delivering the best value. 

If you work for someone else, you should also pay close attention to your goals as they pertain to your company’s goals. Make sure that you evaluate these periodically to ensure alignment. When things fall out of alignment, you can easily get caught in the activity trap only to discover too late that you were chasing the wrong rabbit. 

If you own your own business, evaluate your goals often just to make sure that the ends and the means work harmoniously. The last thing you want to do is harm your reputation by doing something that goes against your principles. Whatever you tell your customers you’re going to do, you must do exactly that. Do not cut corners otherwise your customers will eventually cut you. Be sure to survey them often so that you remain in the know about their most urgent needs and then meet them. 

The bottom line is, endeavor to continuously raise your awareness about what you do and whom you serve. If you make this a habit you will have no trouble moving up in a down economy.

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10 Common New Year’s Resolutions That Usually Fail

Recently I published a newsletter comparing New Year’s resolutions to Real Goals; in that issue, I explained the differences between the 2 and why goals are always better to set than making empty promises to yourself via New Year’s resolutions. You can read this issue on my Facebook profile. 

This post is dedicated to giving you some insight into 10 common New Year’s resolutions that usually fail and the reasons that they most likely do. These are in no particular order – just some insights and observations I’ve picked up over the years.

 

1.   Lose Weight

Weight loss is definitely a top priority when it comes to making resolutions; the news constantly buzzes about it. There are always new ways and new tools to help you drop those unwanted pounds. 

Year after year though, although some people are able to lose some weight after making the resolution to do so, the majority gain the weight back and sometimes even more. Some people don’t even get off the couch to make the effort and weight loss once again becomes a pipedream. 

There are a few reasons that come screaming to mind why this resolution almost always fails:

·         No real commitment

·         No goal weight in mind

·         No deadline for when to get there 

These among other reasons will quickly derail any chance of keeping this resolution. Another major factor is the emotions that run so deeply for many people who struggle with weight. These feelings can be painful and therefore discouragement can set in quickly when the odds appear to be insurmountable.

 

2.   Make More Money

I have done this one to myself quite a few times in the past; each time I did it was a miserable failure. I couldn’t understand why I failed at this so often until I discovered a few insightful things about money and making money. 

You see, money should never really be a reason to do anything. I’ve learned that once you factor money into a decision, your actions can quickly become impulsive and eroded in pursuit of it; especially when you don’t have much in the first place. 

The resolution to make more money usually fails because people either look for the fastest way they can make money or they have no clue where to begin. In either case, this resolution is doomed before it even gets off the ground. 

Here’s why… 

Doing anything just for money almost always means that you do not have a passion for what you’re doing to make this money and therefore you do not care. That means that whether you create and deliver value to others or not doesn’t much matter as long as you make money. If you’ve gone this route before then you know it is short-lived. If you haven’t found out yet – trust me – you will. 

The other reason this resolution falls by the wayside is that you may have no clue what to do to make more money and since you stand for nothing, you end up falling for anything. There are plenty of “Get Rich Quick” schemes out there for all the suckers that are born at the turn of every year. 

The bottom line is that if you need to make more money and you do so by chasing the fastest buck or by trying the latest scams, you won’t succeed. In some cases you may even see some increase in your bank account for a while; however, I guarantee it won’t last if you continue to operate in the same vein.

 

3.   Get a New Job

This one is a very common resolution for the disgruntled employee. I’ll keep it very simple. The individuals that waste their time complaining about their jobs are the ones that never do anything about it. They threaten to leave every now and again but they continue to show up for the pain every day. 

These are the people making this resolution most of the time. Why does it usually fail? Because many people don’t even mean it when they say they are going to find a new job. Additionally, if you were to ask an individual who made this resolution, “when was the last time you updated your resume?” I can almost guarantee you might hear crickets. 

Other factors include:

• Not knowing what type of job you really want
• Do you really hate the one you have or is it the people?
• Can you solve your problem by talking to your boss?
• Is there something that can be done to make you satisfied with the job you have? 

The problem is that 99% of employees don’t ask these questions; neither of themselves nor their peers and superiors. I’ve worked on Wall Street and Main Street and this is one of those things that just don’t change no matter how much everything else does. 

The complainers and whiners threaten to quit while the leaders and heretics make plans to move forward – within or without the organization.

 

4.   Start a Business

For starters, more than 80% of all new startups fail within the first year of business. This fact already eliminates about 99% of the resolution makers since the majority people who start businesses have clear reasons for doing so. They may not have a clue how to run a business but they at least know why they started it. 

That being said, the New Year’s resolution usually fails because of a few reasons:

• No game plan
• No strategy
• No investment
• No research
• No follow up
• No sacrifice 

This list could probably go one for quite a bit but I’ll stop here. Starting a business is not a cake walk; it requires a serious commitment and an action plan to match. Simply making a resolution to do this lacks the depth of substance needed to sustain such a feat. And, if you include partners in this, things can get interesting very quickly. 

Misalignment, miscommunication, confusion and power-tripping are some of the issues that can arise quickly when starting a business becomes a haphazard task. 

If you really want to start a business, don’t make resolutions, set goals and make plans.

 

5.   Get Out of Debt

You’re not going to get out of debt until you stop the hemorrhaging. Many people claim they want to get out of debt – make the resolution to do so – only to continue spending in the exact same manner they did the year before. To top it off, they aren’t usually making any more money than they were making the year before.

Folks, getting out of debt is a serious undertaking – taking it lightly is undoubtedly a huge mistake. The main reason this resolution fails is because most people do not have a budget. They have absolutely no clue how and where their paycheck goes. They only know that they have way too much month left when the paycheck is gone. 

Another major hiccup is that many people are not willing to live without some of the things they want now so that they can get all the things they want later. Instant gratification rules the day for these folks and thus they remain in debt. The insane part is that many people who make this resolution year after year don’t understand why they are still in debt and getting in deeper. 

Simply put, this resolution will fail miserably if you do not want to give up anything or do anything differently.

 

6.   Find a Mate

In my experience, career-driven individuals usually suffer the worst of this resolution. These are the “busy people” of the world. Surely there is nothing wrong with pursuing your career – in fact I most certainly encourage it. The thing is that finding a mate requires that you put certain aspects of your life in the proper context. 

The truth is that most people who make this resolution do so because they think that it’s about time that they have a mate. After all, that’s what life is all about – finding someone with whom to share your dreams and goals. The issue is that this is definitely not a good reason to search for a mate because it can provide bad direction. 

Also, unless you are willing to actually make space in your life for a mate, one will not appear. You may think that things are supposed to fall into place after you’ve found your mate; however, this is not so. The frequency you generate must match with your heart and mind otherwise your mate will continue to elude you. 

If you are currently married to your career, your business, your church or any other activity or endeavor in your life – get unmarried first before pursuing a mate. It doesn’t mean that you let those things go – they are still important to you. It just means that you shift paradigms and put them into the proper perspective. 

In other words, how important is it for you to find a mate? To the degree that this matters to you, your efforts and actions will mirror the same.

 

7.   Exercise Forgiveness

Forgiveness tends to come the hard way most of the time; it is such a simple thing to do and yet it does not come easy. 

This is a resolution usually made when a transgression has been committed against you – some time has passed and yet it continues to eat at you. At some point the stigma of the situation becomes seemingly unbearable and forgiveness seems the best way to let it go.

The roadblock that most often pops up in these scenarios is that the person who needs to do the forgiving misconstrue why they are forgiving in the first place. Typically people believe that forgiveness is for the forgiven; however, the truth is that it is for the forgiver. Unless you recognize this simple truth, it becomes much more difficult to forgive, especially if the transgression was egregious and/or painful. 

If you do not understand forgiveness and its purpose, you will be less likely to truly exercise forgiveness. And, if you really believe that forgiveness is for the forgiven and you don’t believe that he/she deserves it – you will not follow through. You might say you will but your true colors will again come to rouse soon enough.

 

8.   Change Your Circle

A change of circle usually becomes warranted when you find that it is improbable that you will be able to make necessary personal changes while you continue to move in these circles. This can be very tough to follow through on – I have lived this one twice in my life and each time it was extremely difficult. 

Changing your circle can involve pulling away from family, friends and colleagues. You may have been hanging out with some of these folks most of your life and now in order for you to move forward, you have to remove yourself from these people. Yes – this is hard – I know. 

This resolution usually fails because the emotions that come along with doing this are often too much for the individual to bear. They are riddled with guilt, remorse and resentment all rolled into one. Accepting that nothing last forever and that with change sometimes hard decisions like these have to be made can be tough to swallow. 

In order to pull this off, you must be crystal clear about your objective and you must remove the emotions from the equation. If you are not able to do that, you will be hard-pressed to make the decision let alone take action to see this through. 

I don’t envy you if you have to face this challenge; however, I can tell you that of the two times I have had to do it, I am very happy that I did. Good luck! 
  

9.   Speak Your Mind

I have mentored and counseled many smart individuals whose main shortcoming was a lack of their own voice. They have all this tenacity and creativity bottled up inside but no courage to unleash them. 

The main reason this resolution fails is because people allow the fear of consequences to keep them in a box and dumb. The repercussion of such an act as speaking your mind is so great – in your mind – that you simply choose to clam up. 

Often, you hear individuals who make this kind of resolution say (after someone else snatches the thunder), that’s exactly what I was going to say. At this point of course, it doesn’t much matter whether you were going to say it or not. In fact, you’re better off not even letting others hear you say – “I was just going to say that.” 

Another reason this resolution fails is because many people don’t know how to express their thoughts well or they wait until it’s too bottled up and they explode. This usually leads to a “fight or flight” situation. 

If you want to keep this New Year’s resolution, remember this; speaking your mind requires 2 elements:

• Courage – grow a pair   
• Do what’s true for you and learn to live with the consequences – again – grow a pair 
   

“And that’s all I have to say about that.” – Forrest Forrest Gump.

 

10.   End a Relationship

This New Year’s resolution usually fails because of emotional confusion, withdrawal syndrome and fear. Often individuals continue a relationship in the hopes that things will change even though they don’t. This is the fundamental problem of bad relationships and why they tend to prolong. 

Many people continue to believe that one day things will miraculously change even though they do nothing differently. They don’t even so much as issue a real ultimatum – instead they tout empty threats that lose gas very quickly when the emotions come to a cool or in some cases – a boil.

The other factor is the fear of losing; even though the relationship may not be healthy, many people associate the end of a relationship as a loss. Some individuals even chalk it up as a failure rather than a change to move forward. If you cannot view the ending of a relationship as moving forward and all for the best without regrets, it will be difficult to end it. 

The bottom line is that unless you can truly understand why you need to let go; unless you can truly accept the fact that ending the relationship is the best for all parties involved; unless you can see it as a step forward, ending a relationship will be extremely difficult.

 

Phew… that was deep – now what?

Well, I have already written a couple of articles that can help you overcome the New Year’s resolution disease. If you want to discover how to set real goals and create the ultimate plan to achieve them, start by reading the following articles.

• How to Set Goals
• How to Achieve Your Goals

How to Consistently Achieve the Results You Desire

Have you ever noticed how some people almost always achieve the results they desire? How about you – do you often have the same kind of experience in your endeavors? If you do, that is an awesome thing! 

Most people, unfortunately, do not consistently achieve the results they desire. I am not trying to damper your mood; however, this is the simple truth. If you were to take a quick assessment, I am sure you too would conclude the same. Perhaps you’ve even noticed that you are consistently achieving undesired results in your own life. 

The good news is that there is hope for the leaders among us – you too can absolutely experience the thrill of achieving your goals on a consistent basis. Most probably, and if you have half a brain, you are not consistently seeing the results you desire because you are focused on the wrong things. Your energy is spent on the wrong activities and therefore, the results you achieve are not what you want. 

Following are my best insights on how to consistently achieve the results you desire. These 5 keys have always worked for me and I have also seen it work tremendously for others. There is no doubt that you will experience a profound, positive and impacting shift in the results you begin to achieve once you master these disciplines.

 

Key #1 – Know the objective

In order to consistently achieve the results you desire, you must know what your objective is. What is it that you are trying to accomplish? So often I observe individuals who fly by the seat of their pants and hope that things turn out well. 

If you want to make sure that you don’t waste yours and other people’s time, make sure that you know what the mission is. Have a clear picture in your mind as to what the end result is supposed to be. With this in mind, it will certainly help you make better decisions on the tools, resources and people you need to get the job done. 

If you are sketchy on the objective then the results you achieve will ultimately be sketchy as well. There is no way around it; of course you may find that occasionally, you end up where you’re supposed to flying blind; however, that because other people were removing the roadblocks. The day someone doesn’t show up for duty, you’re toast. 

The point is, the clearer you are on the objective, the better the choices you will make and the more likely it will be that you will achieve the results you desire. There is no question that the difference in the results you achieve will be significant if you simply know the objective. 

 

Key #2 – Create an action plan

Once you are crystal clear on your objective, it’s time to create an action plan. Achieving the results you desire on a consistent basis requires that you plan your moves. Every action you take towards your goal must be deliberate. Individuals who are successful at achieving the best results plan every move they make; they leave nothing to chance.

If you want to be part of this group, you must do the same. Just imagine the frustration that might ensue if you try to get to a new destination without the proper map or GPS to guide you. How many times do you need to get lost before you ask for directions or look them up? 

Objectives require planning and plan you must if you want to be successful. Your action plan is your guide; it tells you what actions to take next and also where you are in proximity to your goal. Your action plan is also where you place your dates and deadlines for meeting your objectives.

Individuals who consistently achieve the results they desire have no illusions about what is going on or where they are in their action plan. They keep a bird’s eye view on the process at all times; again, nothing is left to chance. 

If you don’t create an action plan, then your moves become random and that can quickly become confusing. Often people end up going round and round in circles when their actions are randomized. Disorganization and chaos quickly set in and the objective is usually left behind in the dust. 

When you have a clear objective and an action plan to match, your decisions become easier and your moves are much more precise. Your thoughts are uncluttered and your mind is fixed on the desired result.

  

Key #3 – Develop a flexible strategy

Objective – check… action plan – check… now it’s time to strategize. 

Without a good strategy, even the best laid plans will fail. You must develop a flexible strategy that will take you to your objective in the quickest, most efficient and effective way possible. 

By flexible, I mean that your plan must be easily adaptable. You have to be prepared to change your strategy mid-stream if some other factors change in the process. A great strategy is one that is built with anticipation of the unexpected. 

If this sounds like too tall a feat for you, don’t worry – there is a sure way to ensure that your strategy is as flexible as it can be. 

Many people develop strategies based mainly on a short-term view; the steps and tactics used are ones that may get you to the objective but then if something changes mid-process, it’s hard to adapt. A short-term view is only based on the things you can see and the factors that are presented. They do nothing for anticipating changes or preparedness is dealing with other factors that arise down the road. 

The best way to develop a flexible strategy is to ensure that it is grounded in correct principles – aligned with natural law. The steps and tactics then become merely the byproducts of the strategy meaning that the underlying principles of your strategy never change; however, the steps and tactics easily can. With your strategy built on the backbone of principles, it makes your decisions regarding the steps you take and tactics you use easier.

What exactly do I mean by developing a strategy grounded in correct principles? I am glad you asked. 

Here’s the deal… 

If we look at the Law of Momentum which says that one courageous action taken over and over again only gets easier, bigger and better as time goes on – it can easily tell you where to spend your time. Your strategy may include many different steps and tactics; however, you may find that one or two in particular yield much greater results more efficiently and in a more effective manner. What do you do? Do you continue to give the working strategies the same amount of time and energy or do you increase them on these and reduce on others that do not work so well? 

You may be surprised to know how many people don’t even think this is important. It’s as if you are given a budget for a particular project with fixed monies allocated to different tasks and no matter how much more productive doing one of these tasks is, the money manager won’t move funds around to provide more support for the more productive option. That is crazy to me – BUT – that’s just me. 

The point is that when you develop a strategy based on correct principles, it becomes much easier to change the steps and tactics you take and use to achieve your objective. The result is what matters most – how you get there is an evolving animal. That is why your strategy needs to be grounded in correct principles so that the how is only compiled of right action and nothing adverse that will undoubtedly come back to haunt you.

 

Key #4 – Execute Efficiently

Efficient execution is often overlooked or underplayed when it comes to achieving objectives. This is because the term is often misunderstood or not used at all in any form. 

To execute efficiently, you must understand exactly what it will take to achieve the results you desire. Although these can change as the process evolves, it is important that you make it a point to understand the tools, resources and people you will need. If you understand these, you will know exactly what to do, when to do it and whom should do it. 

Part of efficient execution involves knowing your strengths and weaknesses. For the parts of the strategy where your strengths apply, spend most of your personal time in these areas. For the parts of the strategy where you are weaker, employ others, use resources – simply put – ask for help. 

As Stephen R. Covey puts it, “the true pinnacle of excellence does not lie in our independence but in our interdependence.” The better and more effectively we can work with others, the greater the results we will achieve. 

If you want to execute your strategy efficiently, make it a priority to know how and where the pieces fit. Know whom to delegate different tasks to and also when to employ different tools and resources. The better you are at this, the better your execution and the better the results you will yield.

 

Key #5 – Smash the status quo

If you want to be in the class of individuals that consistently achieve the results they desire, observe the masses and do the opposite. Individuals who fight to keep the status quo create nothing greater than themselves – that’s a fact. This doesn’t mean that the current process isn’t working – it just means that you are the type of person that is always looking for more creative and effective ways to do something. 

Seth Godin, one of my favorite authors, calls these types of individuals “heretics” – the leaders of tomorrow. 

Be a heretic; the status quo is there for the risk averse – the people who accept mediocrity. The status quo is also there for leaders like you to smash to bits with the next great idea. 

The reason this is important in consistently achieving the results you desire is because not all strategies work – not all plans come to fruition. Knowing that you can do things differently is what separates winners from losers. Just because something didn’t work doesn’t mean it can’t – it simply means you need to modify your plan and/or your strategy. 

There nothing worse than doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. That’s the Japanese definition of insanity – it’s also mine because I think that’s nuts. 

If you are not willing to learn from your mistakes and failings, change the things you need to and lead with creativity and passion, it will be very difficult for you to consistently achieve the results you desire. Don’t fool yourself into believing that failure is anything but and event from which you can learn and grow. If you are not going to change, you might as well stop trying right now. You’d only be wasting your time achieving nothing worthwhile; just the same old misery. 

Simply going with the flow and upholding the status quo is like living in a box; and if you live in a box, you think in a box. If these are the results you desire – no worries – you just wasted about 10 minutes of your mediocre life. If however you want to achieve great things, endeavor to learn, change and grow. You will undoubtedly achieve the results you desire much more consistently.

The Law of Attraction Exposed

The Law of Attraction is probably one of the most written about principles and there is no doubt that it is warranted. Not just because it is an absolute truth but also because many people still have no clue how it applies to their lives. Many people still don’t understand how this natural law works or even that it works at all. 

Firstly, whether you believe that the law of attraction works or not is absolutely irrelevant. Why? Because it simply does not matter that you believe it or not – it merely exists. It is a principle – a natural law and therefore it exists and functions infinitely and indefinitely with or without your belief in it. It affects you every single second of every day whether you want it to or not. 

Secondly, how the law of attraction affects you is absolutely up to you. While you are not able to control the function of any principle, you can certainly influence how they affect you. This is your choice whether you know it or not – it is entirely up to you how the law of attraction plays into your life. 

That being said, here are 4 elements to help you understand how the law of attraction works and how you can influence its role in your life.

 

1. We are not necessarily what we think about

Contrary to what many believe, we are not necessarily what we think about. The reason for this is that we often think things that we don’t truly believe. Simply thinking about something does not cause it to manifest in your life; you have to truly believe it. 

When teachers and scholars say, “we are what we think about”, it is actually an incomplete statement. The missing piece of that is the part about belief. Do you really believe the things that you think about? What ever thoughts are hard-wired into your core will manifest in your life. Often you will find people confused about the things that occur in their lives simply because they do not understand that their true beliefs are the cause. 

It doesn’t matter what you think if you don’t believe it.

 

2. We are whatever frequency we generate

Just as it is certain that we are not necessarily what we think about, it is certain that we are and become whatever frequency we generate. To the degree that you emit certain energy, the manifestation will match. 

Simply put, if you think about something that you absolutely believe your energy will also send out the same signal thereby attracting other like signals to you. This is the power of the law of attraction. Like energy attracts like energy – not just like thinking – but like frequency. 

It is no different than the way police radios work; they all have to be on the same channel generating the same frequency otherwise they won’t be able to communicate. What often clutters up and/or distorts this frequency is our disbelief. 

Think about Murphy’s Law for a second…

This is a myth that says that whatever can go wrong will; it is usually applied when your day starts on what is in your eyes a bad note. From that moment on you begin to believe that every thing else in your day will go wrong and so it does. The truth is that there is no Murphy’s Law – this is simply the Law of Attraction in action. 

You see, no matter how many good thoughts you think during this day that started on a bad note for you, it won’t matter if your belief and your frequency don’t match. In fact, your level of frustration may go through the roof as you begin to wonder what the hell you’re doing wrong. After all, you’ve had nothing but positive thoughts all day and yet – CRAP keeps on happening. 

The real question you should be asking in a situation like this is – did I really believe the positive thoughts I was thinking? Was my energy truly positive or was I just masking my true beliefs?

The law of attraction doesn’t care what you think – only what you believe which dictates the frequency you generate.

 

3. We receive what we believe

Haven’t you ever heard someone say “I’ll believe it when I see it?” perhaps you’ve even said it yourself. This is not true of course. Contrary to popular belief, “seeing is not believing – believing is seeing.” 

We receive what we believe. This is often the missing piece of the puzzle for those who would believe that the law of attraction is bogus. They often put sight before faith. Nothing manifests without first having belief present – this is a natural law – a universal principle. If you don’t believe something is going to change in your life, nothing will. If something does change in your life that you truly did not believe would, it was influenced by others and it certainly won’t last beyond their beliefs. 

Your belief is absolutely crucial to the results and things that manifest in your life. There is no point is simply thinking about things and changes if you do not believe they will happen. If you believe they won’t – it pretty much a certainty that you are right.

 

4. Thought follows belief

How the law of attraction affects you is strictly up to you. This is because you can control what you believe and the thoughts that enter your brain. Sure, it takes some practice to shut off the unwanted thoughts; however, with practice, you will get better. 

Besides, the more important factor is to focus on what you truly believe. A good way to start this process is to go with bite-sized chunks at first. In other words, don’t think about becoming president of the company while you are an assistant manager – it may be hard for you to believe. Instead, think about what the next promotion would be like to manager and then focus on what it will take to make it happen. Being a much more attainable goal – it will be instantly more believable. 

After you’ve had a few successes under your belt – start stretching your dreams a bit further each time. The goal is to ensure that your thoughts follow your beliefs. Make sure that you really believe the thoughts you entertain otherwise it will be difficult to manifest them physically.

You have the power to choose your beliefs and your thoughts so focus on making them the right ones.

How to Achieve Your Goals – Plan, Prepare and Expect

Have you ever wondered… wished… dreamed... but get nowhere really fast? What’s stopping you? What is really standing between you and your goals; your dreams? 

If you really want to achieve your goals; cause your wonders, wishes and dreams to manifest, what is holding you back? 

Many people believe that people who consistently achieve their goals are often lucky and/or inherently ordained with some magical success juice… aka “pixie dust.” Some people even believe that you must be born of a certain stature and in a certain environment to guarantee success in life. It seems all too simple when I put it like this; however, if you think about it, you will realize that you’ve either thought this way or know people who have (and do). 

The truth is that there is no magic juice (pixie dust) and there is no genetic make up that dictates one person’s success versus another. Would it surprise you to discover that your success rests entirely in your hands? No matter what has happened in your past or what you might be facing at this very moment, your future is completely up to you and what you make of it. 

The great Zig Ziglar put it this way and I often ask my audience before I begin a talk or workshop. 

If you can answer yes to these 4 questions…

1. Is there something specific that you can do today that can absolutely make your personal and professional life worse?

2. Is there something specific that you can do today that can absolutely make your personal and professional life better?

3. Do you believe that it is a choice? 

4. Do you believe that every choice has an end result? 

…here’s what you’ve basically said whether you realize it or not. 

I don’t care what has happened in my past; I don’t even care what is going on in my life right now. I know that there is something specific I can do today that will make my life better or worse and the choice is mine. 

Now that is a beautiful feeling – wouldn’t you say. 

In my experience, one of the major roadblocks in achieving goals has always been the lack of a good roadmap. I have mentored and coached so many individuals who simply could not begin to realize their true gifts and talents simply because they had no blueprint to guide them. The vicious cycle of frustration will always continue until you find the b-line that leads out of the disorganization and chaos. 

Don’t underestimate the impact of disorganization and chaos; simply having disorganized and chaotic thoughts can send you down a circuitous path to nowhere very quickly. 

The only difference between you and truly successful people is that they understand the significance of 3 key elements when it comes to achieving goals. They recognize the importance of Planning, Preparation and Expectation. 

In order to consistently achieve the results you desire, you must endeavor to Plan, Prepare and Expect them to happen. Truly successful people are not lucky; rather, they create their own luck! 

I have heard people say that prayer resolves all things but the real truth is that prayer without action produces exactly what you had before you prayed – NOTHING! Any kind of thought without deliberate action moves nothing in your favor. It all sounds great; however, if you don’t act, manifestation cannot occur. 

Understanding the 3 key elements in achieving your goals and how they apply will undoubtedly help you to consistently garner the results you desire.

  

Plan

Without a plan, you will not know how to move, when to move or what to move towards. Even in broad daylight you would be no more apt than a bat if you have no map to guide you. If you truly want to achieve at the highest level, take the time to formulate a plan that is aligned with your goals. 

If you know who you are and where you want to go, your next step has to be planning exactly how you will get there. 

Have you ever heard “busy people” say I’ve got places to go and people to see? The difference between these people and truly successful people is that successful people also have places to go and people to see; however, successful people know exactly why they are going to see these people and why they are going to places they are going. There is nothing surprising or accidental about their actions – they are deliberate. 

In order to remove frustration and chaos from your path, you must have a plan in place to guide you. Your plan is your roadmap – it tells you exactly where you are in your journey so that you know exactly what you must do next in order to achieve your goals. 

Truly successful people don’t just plan for today or tomorrow, they put a plan together for the long term. Eventually, their plan evolves to include the next generation and perhaps a few down the road. In fact, I don’t know any truly successful people that aren’t always planning. Planning is the cornerstone of results; if you don’t plan for the results you desire, how can you achieve them? Certainly you may do it by default once or twice; however, without a real blueprint in place, your lucky days are numbered. 

Simply put, if you fail to plan, plan to fail.   

Prepare

If you do not prepare, your plan will count for naught. Planning alone is not enough because you can plan forever and if you never make a move; your plan becomes a theory. 

In order to bring your plan to life, you must prepare and be prepared. Whatever your plan dictates, you must not only be prepared to take the actions but also to deal with the consequences of those actions. In fact, to the degree that you are prepared, your plan will succeed. 

Only through preparation can you realize the full potential of your plan. This is not as easy as it may sound so I’m going to share a few examples with you. 

A man says he intends to run the New York City Marathon in the next 8 months. Although he is not a trained long-distanced runner, he has challenged himself to finish in record time. He puts a plan together that outlines the resources he needs and actions he needs to take in order to prepare for the marathon. 

Let’s say that he finds a sponsor, starts an appropriate diet, buys all the neat gear but he does no training whatsoever; what do you suppose will happen when it’s time to run? 

Do you think he will be prepared? 

Of course not! He did everything – except – the most important thing – he didn’t train for the race. If he didn’t train and he is not a runner, his body will not be able to withstand the physical ardor of the marathon. The record, I can assure you, will elude him. 

In another scenario, let’s say a career woman intends to find the man of her dreams. She looks deep within herself in search of the qualities that she desires in a mate. Focused, driven, ambitious, loving, devoted, honest and romantic are just some of the characteristics that come to mind. 

Now suppose she continues to devote most of her time to her career, dates multiple men every once in a while and fills her network with mostly on-the-job colleagues; what do you suppose are her chances of landing the mate she desires. That’s right, almost nil. Sure, some women may eventually land that special someone under these conditions but at what cost? 

The fact is, at this rate, she would not be prepared to find let alone receive such a mate. Simply saying you want a mate without making room in your life and preparing to receive one is just not enough. It won’t happen. 

Preparation requires that you make the necessary changes and take the necessary actions in order to execute your plan. If you want to improve upon your personal growth but yet have no desire to change, there is simply no point. You cannot grow personally unless you change something you are currently doing. In order to do that, you must first plan and then prepare by making choices and taking actions to that end.

 

Expect

If you don’t expect it to happen, it won’t. Unless you are expecting the results you desire to manifest in your life, they absolutely will not – at least not at the level you want them to. 

The truth is that you reap more than you sow and that goes both ways. 

If you have any doubt about the results you expect, you will half-ass your plan which will cause you to take half-assed actions which will consequently produce half-assed results. Once you have a plan in place and you prepare by making choices and taking action, you must expect to get exactly what you planned and prepared for. It is natural law that the universe returns to you in abundance and more than what you put out. 

If your plan is sound, your choices are clear and your actions are deliberate, I guarantee you will produce a result of equal or greater value.  

Look, if I write a check knowing I don’t have the cash in the bank to cover it, I expect it to bounce – plain and simple. The same holds true for the other way around. If you stick to your plan and consistently follow through in the preparation, your goals will manifest as long as you expect them to. 

This doesn’t mean that things always go as planned – that would be naïve thinking. I am simply saying that you cannot expect a particular result if you have not planned or prepared for it. Expectation follows planning and preparedness. 

If you do not have a roadmap, your thoughts are in disarray and your moves are disorganized then you should realistically expect the results you achieve to resemble that picture. 

Do not be unrealistic with your expectations; just because you expect something doesn’t mean it will manifest. If you have not put in the appropriate time to plan and prepare accordingly, don’t expect much. If your expectations are not in line with your actions, prepare to be disappointed. 

When you do not plan and prepare yet you expect great things to happen, that’s called imposing on others. If you expect others to deliver what you want without any work on your part, your expectations will be unrealistic.

 

Growth by Design

There is nothing accidental about what happens to truly successful people who achieve at a high level. It is a deliberate result of a sound plan, thorough preparation and realistic expectation. 

If you are creating and delivering value in any way, you can realistically expect a correlating or exceeding reward. This is natural law – this principle does not change. 

Achieving your goals requires a specific design of a plan in order to take the first step. The results you desire in your personal growth and your life will not show up in a Cracker Jack box; you have to plan and prepare for them. Only then can you realistically expect them to manifest. 

Successful growth occurs through design and if you want to guide and control what happens as you grow, I strongly suggest you begin designing your action plan right now. If you don’t, I can guarantee you that the results you desire will become fantasy and never see the light of day. 

Successful people are not special simply because they are successful; they are special because of the road they walked to get there. They put in the work; they plan; they prepare and they expect – CONSTANTLY!

 

How to Set Goals

I use to truck through the year trying to achieve New Year’s resolutions that I had set since the last Christmas holiday. It seemed like a good way to go about achieving my goals at the time, especially since most other people I knew were also doing the same thing. 

For the most part, I would fail to stick to or achieve about 99% of the resolutions I had set. This obviously used to frustrate me to no end because I just couldn’t figure out what I was doing wrong. It took a while for me to reach the other side of this major pain and on to more tranquil pastures; however, once I discovered the problem, things immediately changed. 

Through my fervent pursuit of personal growth and development, I was introduced to an awesome book by one of my favorite authors and speakers, Stephen R. Covey. It’s called The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, which I highly recommend. This book absolutely changed the way I viewed many things – and one thing in particular – Goal Setting. 

What I learned from Stephen Covey about setting goals is that if you neither know why you’re doing something, how you plan to do it nor by when you plan to have it done – it simply won’t happen. This, as it turned out, was my very problem. I was not used to defining the why or the roadmap of achieving my goals. 

It is like this article you are reading right now – I have a specific goal in mind for it and I know exactly how I plan to do it. That being said, the goal of this article is to help you understand the importance of setting goals as well as a guide on how to set them so that you are successful in your endeavors.

 

Why it’s important to set goals

Setting goals is important because it keeps your eye on the ball – keeps you focused. It helps you to discern what is and isn’t important to you much more easily. This is how you make good decisions about how and where to target your energy. 

When you set goals, it gives you a much keener sense of clarity and direction. Goal setting is crucial to helping you define your purpose – your mission and how you plan to achieve the results you desire. 

People who do not set goals are easily prone to disorganization, unfocused and confusing thoughts and actions. It can lead you in a vicious circle of frustration if you have not laid out a plan for the results you want to achieve. Without goals, you can easily become overwhelmed which leads to aggravation and disappointment. Not setting goals is like setting yourself up for failure. 

If you want to consistently achieve the results you desire and fulfill your goals and dreams, make goal setting a consistent part of your life. Give it the time and energy it deserves. I guarantee that you will see significant and profound positive changes in the results you achieve. You will also be a lot less frustrated because of it. 
 

All true goals have a specific why

True goals all have a specific reason for setting them. The “why” of a goal is the fuel that drives the thoughts and actions in achieving it. It must be personal and important to you in order to maximize the results. 

The “why” of a goal must also be as specific as possible; even if there is more than one reason – be specific. The more specific you are, the more acutely you can focus which will in turn yield much better results. 

There are 2 questions you must ask yourself in order to get to the true “why” of a goal.

1. What is the goal? – First you must clearly define what it is you are trying to accomplish and be as specific as possible. A good rule of thumb to apply is the shorter the term of the goal, the more specific you want to be. In other words, long-term goals (12 months+) can be in broader strokes and short-term goals (less than 6 months) needs more narrow strokes.

 

2. Why is this goal important to you? – Secondly, you must decide why this goal is important to you. Again, you must be specific. By specific, I mean, make sure you know what change in your life will happen if you achieve this goal; how your life will be positively impacted. Of equal importance; make sure you know what negative changes will happen in your life if you don’t achieve this goal – again, this will keep you focused.

  

Take full responsibility for how you achieve your goals

Once you’ve set your goals and you know why you’ve set them, it is up to you to figure out how to achieve them. How you achieve your goals rests with you and not others. Often, people set goals and then blame others when things don’t turn out the way they would like them to. 

No matter what you think – if you do not achieve your goals – it is because of you. There is a reason you set your own goals; they are important to you. In that vein, you should also accept full responsibility for achieving them. This does not mean that other people can’t help you – in fact, I encourage and implore you to seek the help of others. The point is that whatever happens, the choices you make will determine the results you ultimately achieve. 

There are 2 questions you must ask yourself in order to decipher the best “how” of achieving your goals.

1. Do I have everything I need to achieve my goal? – This means that you have to examine the people, tools and resources you have available to you and decide whether or not they are enough to help you reach your goal. Take nothing for granted and leave no stone unturned in this process. The good news is that this part of the process can easily evolve and you can add and delete as necessary. If the answer to this question is “NO” or your resources become inadequate, then you will need to address question 2.

 

2. What additional people, tools and resources do I need to help me achieve my goal? – Again, take nothing for granted in this process. You want to make certain that you are connecting with the right people, have all the right tools and access to the right resources that will help you achieve the results you desire.

 

It’s not real unless it’s dated

When was the last time you got something important done accurately and in a timely manner that you didn’t date? You know what I mean – I’m going to clean out the garage or I’ll fix the leaky pipe and the list goes on and on.  The important question to ask is – WHEN? 

Your goal isn’t real until you know when you plan to achieve it. You have to put a date on all your goals. It gives you more focus and also a sense of urgency. Most importantly, it places high value on your time and efforts. Psychologically, dating your goals helps you keep the end in mind which will fuel your drive to excel. 

Declaring that you are going to start your own business without a date of when you plan to do it doesn’t do much to motivate you or anyone else for that matter. Without a time frame on the ultimate prize, you’re just puffing hot air which makes you nothing but a wandering, wishing windbag. 

If you wish for something without a plan to act on it, plan to spend a lot of your pennies at the wishing well. Unless you plan to act, nothing will happen – the genie does not come out when you rub the lamp to grant you 3 wishes. 

The reason I’m driving so hard at this point is because it is vital that you understand the importance of putting dates on your goals. Dating will drive you to excel and fuel your motivation to keep marching on day after day through thick and thin. Additionally, a date will help you better define the actual steps you need to take and when you need to take them. 

Make sure that you decide WHEN you will achieve the goals you set.

 

A caveat about commitment

All of the above will undoubtedly help you to set and achieve your goals in a much more effective manner. In that vein, make sure your level of commitment matches the importance of your goals. It is easy to forget why we are doing something when we get caught up in the world wind of life. 

Here’s a tip I learned very painfully many years ago – WRITE IT DOWN! You will be amazed at how much your level of commitment increases when you write down your goals – put it on paper and review it often. I usually go over my short-term goals once a week and the long-term ones at least once a month. 

Things can change so quickly that in order for you to stay on top of what you want to achieve, you need to look at it frequently. Somehow, seeing your goals in writing does a great deal to galvanize your resolve and determination. It serves as a refueling mechanism especially since we can be so easily distracted by life. 

If you want to do yourself a great service and stay focused, write down your goals and the outline of how and when you plan to achieve them. I guarantee that this will make a huge difference in the results you achieve if you review them often enough. Find an interval of review that suits you or simply do it when you need a boost in your spirit. 

Forget about making empty promises to yourself and coming up with meaningless resolutions. Do something worthwhile and make a real difference in your life – set goals and then take action to achieve them. No one else is going to do it for you.